Maleigha's Test: Part 2

Well, we went to Cincinnati yesterday with the intention of hearing some news about the test that Mia had done a few weeks ago. We were not expecting her to have to have another test done...and find out that she needs yet another test in December. I am glad that they are being so thorough in their diagnosis and treatment and the people at Cincinnati Children's Hospital are so nice...but I have discovered that I am not as patient as I thought I was. I really just want to have all the tests done and know the full extent of what is wrong so that we can fix it and move on with our lives. At the same time, over the last few weeks and through watching all the kids coming in and out of the hospital yesterday...I have seen how much I really have to thank my amazing God for. We have our Mia with us and she has a condition that is treatable and she is currently functioning just fine. And thus far I have learned to trust God more than I ever have and I am learning patience...though that may take awhile.

We found out yesterday that the results from Mia's last test were not so good but the doctor said not to really freak out about that yet because Mia simply being upset while the test was taking place could have possibly caused the results to be skewed. He said the test showed that where her bladder should be holding 40 mL at a time, she can only hold 1. And then the ultrasound that she had yesterday revealed that her bladder is having to work way too hard and this has caused scar tissue to form along the inside of her bladder. And because her bladder cannot get rid of urine as it should, there is urine collecting on her kidneys which has caused some swelling and over time could cause distress for her kidneys.

I have a hard time not thinking too far ahead to some of the possibilities that the doctor mentioned...to surgery, to the possibility of surgery not even helping the problem, to having to learn to catheterize my own daughter, to kidney problems...and my mind can even come up with things that the doctor didn't even mention. But God continually pushes those things out of mind, reminding me that he will only give me what I can handle and that through suffering comes endurance, character and hope and he is leading me step by step (not giant leap by giant leap) and that all things will work together for my good. God's Word gives such great encouragment in times of uncertainty!

I just ask that you pray for Maleigha as we continue this process. Please pray most of all that God would be glorified in my and David's thoughts and actions. God has truly blessed us with friends and family who faithfully pray! Thanks!

Perseverance Through Suffering

Recently I have observed two godly families as they have endured the loss of their very young daughters. Upon hearing the news about each child's death I began to question my faith...is my faith in God firm enough that I could endure such a tragedy and still bring glory to Him? How could I possibly lose someone I love and still find the strength to praise God? I wrestled for days with this concept and only found myself more frustrated and discouraged until I came to the chapter on perseverance in the book I am reading (Discliplines of a Godly Woman by Barbara Hughes).

She started the chapter by relaying the story of a couple who were in a terrible car accident and lost 6 of their 9 children when the car burst into flames. She told of how the couple's physical recovery gave them time to read the Word of God and reflect on his character and promises. Though I began to see the process that they went through to bring glory to God through their suffering, I still found myself discouraged. I thought "I still believe that if I were faced with the death of my child, I don't know if I could truly bring glory to God in the way that these families have".

But as I read on, the author made a point that finally gave me some hope. "Faith in the goodness of God in the face of extreme adversity doesn't just happen. It grows out of perseverance in the day-in, day-out grind of everyday life". These families that I had observed and read about were not just suddenly stricken with amazing faith in God that they had not cultivated. The faith came because they had spent years knowing God better and trusting every day in the goodness, mercy, justice, kindness, grace, omniscience, omnipotence and sovereignty of God. So faith like this comes from trusting in God through my daughter's doctors appointments and possible surgery. It comes from praising God when I feel like crying because people I trusted have hurt me. It comes even from just relying on God to give me patience with my husband leaves his socks in the floor.

I also was reminded that even our cultivation of faith is not enough. Jesus Christ himself has given us an example to follow. He endured the cross (physical pain and separation from God) to bring glory to his Father. And as well, the Holy Spirit prays on our behalf. That is amazing to me! That God himself prays for us! God piles on top of our faith (which he has given us anyway, by his grace) a special prayer just for us.

And even beyond those things, I have learned that I should not be afraid of or resist suffering because God uses it as a means to make us more like Him. This is something that, as long as we are on earth, we will always need more of. He also uses the suffering of His saints to spread the Gospel--people can see how great our God really is when we rely on him no matter how difficult (or just plain annoying) a situation might be. And this is the one I find most inspiring...God also uses suffering as a means for us to see Him. We can learn so much about God through hard things that we go through.

Mommy, we didn't pray yet

I really believe that we are given children to sanctify us in so many ways. I have learned so much already in just the short year and three months that my daughter has been in this world. She teaches me patience on those days that she won't let me out of her sight even to go to the bathroom. She keeps me from being lazy by getting me out of bed at 6am. She teaches me how to not hold a grudge when she gives me a big hug after I've just punished her for opening the kitchen cabinets. She teaches me what it really means to love...just because she is so lovable.

But this week, she really put me in my place when I neglected to thank God as I should. I was in a hurry to get our lunch ready because I wanted to get her down for a nap on time. I put her food in front of her and she sat quietly as I ran around the kitchen getting something for myself. I quickly got my food and drink, sat down and immediately began eating. She just stared at me like I was doing something weird and then she did something that made me stop what I was doing...she bowed her head and closed her eyes as if to say, "Mommy, we didn't pray yet." I followed the example of my little Mia and bowed my head and prayed. And in my heart I was thanking God that slowly my daughter was learning to love Him.

Maleigha's Test

**For those of you who are also on the women's yahoo group for 3ABC or who keep up with Facebook--This is the same message I posted at both places so if you already read it, you can save yourself the time and stop reading now.

Some people had commented on my Facebook account that they would like
an update about Mia. Until Thursday nothing had really happened
since we moved to Ohio. We had a little trouble getting things to
work out at the hospital in Cinci. We had the records of her
ultrasound and MRI sent from Kosair in Louisville to the children's hospital in
Cinci and they decided that she needed one more test. We had been
waiting for a long time for them to call us and finally they called
last week with an appointment for Thursday. It was kind of short
notice but since we had been waiting so long, we just dropped
everything and went.

The test was called a Urodynamics test. It was a little difficult
for all of us because they had to put a catheter in her and she was
scared and upset and then that made David and I upset for her. But
by God's grace the test didn't take too long and the people were very
nice. This test is done to show how well the bladder empties and
fills. It also measures the pressures in the bladder and the function
of the muscles that cause the bladder to open and close. This is the
definitive test to finalize a diagnosis when all other tests have
confirmed the presence of tethered cord. We are still praying that
all other tests have been wrong while continuing to trust God and
pray that we would be strong and faithful even if Mia does end up
needing surgery. It feels hard to pray for both of those things
because I would ultimately prefer her to be perfectly healthy.

Through this and other cirmumstances, God has really been teaching me
a lot about suffering for His glory. I've just seen time after time,
how God works through hard times (much harder times than what we have
ever gone through) and this encourages me to trust Him and persevere.
Thanks to those who are praying for us, those who showed concern
about Mia's test and those who are reading this now. Hope you all
are doing well.

Bryce's Birthday

Here are some pictures of Maleigha enjoying Bryce's 4th birthday. She wasn't really sure she wanted to go at first. And then when we got there, all the people scared her...but as she does at every party, she quickly became comfortable with the crowd and had a lot of fun. Her favorite discovery was Bryce's kitchen set. She opened the doors and put plastic food, plates and silverware in, then shut the doors and opened them again to take it all out. She was in her own little world for awhile and I could only bring her out of it with cake.

OPGA Convention

I was at my mom and dad's for the evening and thought I would hurry and get some pictures up of Maleigha...for anyone who has been patient enough to wait for them. She is growing up so much! Here are some cute pictures of my little Mia enjoying the propane convention that we went to with my family.

We got to go to a water park where Mia was absolutely fearless. She loved crawling through the wading pool...she would have kept crawling until the water was over her head if I hadn't stopped her. She loved splashing in the fountains and watching the other kids.

We also got to go to a fancy dinner...the perfect occasion for her fluffy tutu. Everything about the trip made her so excited. She was excited that the whole family could be together, she loved playing at the water park and watching the big TV in the motel room. She had a great time loving on baby Collin and wrestling with her big cousin, Bryce.

Just wanted to share a cute picture of Maleigha. This is my favorite outfit!

She is growing up so much. She can say Mama, Dada, Nana, cracker and duck...and she also quacks. She is also starting to try to repeat everything that we say. It's cute when she sings along with David as he plays the guitar or when she tries to say car or dog or kitty and can't quite get it, but it's not so cute when she mocks her cousin,Bryce, when he cries or she shakes her head no and mimics us by saying "na, na, na, na".

I finally got a good video of her dancing today...and if our internet weren't so slow I would share it with you. But, it took 20 minutes just to get this little picture on here...so I'd rather not attempt a video right now. I will just tell you that it is very cute. Mia is the best dancer that I know.

Rainy Day Fun

Since the rain has trapped us indoors today I am getting to see my daughter's many tricks as she attempts to overcome boredom...and in doing so, she is making things a little less tedious for me as well.

We have rolled the ball back and forth for awhile. She would hold the ball in her hand and flail her arms around until the ball slipped out of her hands and rolled across the floor. Occasionally the ball rolled to me as I sat only a couple feet away...but the game wasn't really being played for accuracy, we were just having fun. And from the squeals and giggles that escaped from Maleigha I could tell our goal had been reached.

I have also seen her repertoire of goofy faces. She finds it facinating to grind her teeth together which makes a horrible noise and contorts her face into an awkward but cute grin. She also loves to blink at me and blow spit out of the side of her mouth.

But most of our time was spent today dancing with the music turned up loud. My little Mia loves to dance and she's pretty good at it too. She shimmies her shoulders back and forth and rocks back and forth on her bottom. When she stands up she bounces with her knees bent and cocks her head to one side and then the other with a big grin on her face. With as much fun as we had today, I would wish for rainy days everyday!

God is in control

I had a taken a little break from posting because I wasn't enjoying it anymore and I really didn't think that anyone was reading my blog. But after a few comments from people that they were still checking my blog everyday and even printing off some of my old stuff I decided to give it another try.

I've been a little frustrated lately because I feel after all we've been through to move back to Scioto county and all the ways that God has led us to be here I just thought that ministry here would be so obvious and available. We felt called to start a college ministry at Bigelow as soon as we got here but lately it has seemed nearly impossible for it to work. After other obligations have piled up and another, much larger church has developed a very similar ministry with many of the same ideas I just find myself wanting to give up. But...

The good news is that God is in control. He knows what is best for us and what He really wants us to focus on. He can make a great ministry out of seemingly impossible circumstances. And as I read the book of John this week I was reminded that Jesus didn't have a big group of people to back him up, he didn't have a band and loud music and he didn't have parties and exciting speakers...it was just him and people were drawn to that. As long as we are focused on the truth and sharing Jesus with others that is really all we are supposed to do. We shouldn't compare our ministry to the one down the street, we should just look to God as our "audience of one". What we are seeking is to make true believers not to have a big group of people who only think they might be going to heaven.

Easter

Since our move, it has been a little frustrating trying to keep up with my blog. Not only has life become a lot more hectic but our internet won't allow me to download pictures onto my blog to share with my interested viewers...which is the only joy that blogging really brought me. I just feel like if I can't share pictures why even take the time to post. Our internet is dial-up but also free, so I can't complain too much.

So anyway...here is a picture I snapped of Mia enjoying her Easter celebration at Nana's. She opened her Spring basket at from Mommy and Daddy at home on Saturday before Easter. We started this tradition to avoid confusion about what Resurrection Day is really all about and because it is so much easier. We won't have to worry about hurrying through the festivities or getting up even earlier or having to tear our children away from their new stuff. Working out deals about when and where to eat candy will be a different story...but we'll deal with that when it is actually an issue.

Happy Valentine's Day

Just wanted to share some cute pictures of Mia in her Valentine's outfit.

Valentine's Day was special for her because she got to spend the evening with Nana and Papaw and her favorite guy, Bryce...while Mommy and Daddy stayed at home eating Chinese food and heart shaped chocolate chip tarts (which I almost burned the kitchen down trying to make, but ended up being proud of). Hope everyone spent the day with someone they loved...I know I did!

Ear piercing adventure

Mia got her ears pierced today and I just wanted to post a few pictures. I had wanted to get her ears pierced since she was born but I was continuously afraid. I just hated the thought of having something done that would hurt her but was completely unnecessary. After six months of deciding to go for it and then not going through with it, I finally did it. I went to Walmart not really thinking about getting her ears pierced. I filled my cart full of groceries and when I passed by the jewelry counter I thought, "It's now or never" and I just went for it on my way to the check-out. The lady marked her ears with the purple marker and called another worker over to help. I hated having to hold Mia's arms down and her head still but she did really well and didn't fight against me. They each took their turn with the piercing guns...pop, pop...and it was over. Mia screamed for about 20 seconds as I prepared her bottle, but as soon she got it in her mouth she had forgotten about the whole incident.

One of the reasons I wanted her to have earrings so badly was because she doesn't have much hair and a lot of people have thought she was a boy...even once when she had a pink shirt on with flowers. So, I thought that getting her ears pierced would keep people from calling her a boy, but I guess that was too much to expect because as we left the post office today...with her new earrings shining in the sun, her shirt with a lace collar, her sweater adorned with flowers...a lady commented, "Aww look at him, he's so cute." I've done everything short of tatooing "I'm a girl" on her head. Oh well...

Hope you enjoy the pictures.

Matthew: A Call to Humility

Is anyone else attempting to read through the bible in a year? I've made it so far...although I'm about 5 or 6 days behind. It has been relatively easy to keep up with this time despite that I now have a 6 month old, a house with more rooms, and a new role as a pastor's wife to compete for my time in the Word. God's grace has really been upon me and He has kept my heart and mind eager for Him.

A theme that I have noticed over and over as I read the book of Matthew, is resisting pride and striving to be humble. In Matthew 6 we are reminded that if you seek your recognition on earth that is your reward but if you are humble and do good things because it pleases the Lord then you will be rewarded much more in heaven. In Matthew 18 the disciples ask, "Who is the greatest?" and Jesus tells them that unless they become humble they will not enter the kingdom of heaven. And in Matthew 20 James and John's mother desires for them to be at Jesus' right and left hand but Jesus simply reminds those who were listening that he had come to do the will of his Father...he came not to be served but to serve.

Jesus is our ultimate example when it comes to being humble. He healed the sick, he spoke to the outcasts and he spent time with the sinners who no one else would have anything to do with. He humbled himself to leave heaven and spend time with people like us knowing that we would reject him and he would end up on a cross to be a sacrifice for us. How can we have an ounce of pride in our hearts if we would even think of how awful our sin is in the light of Christ's holiness?

Update and Prayer

I finally feel like I've established some sort of routine here after the craziness of the holidays. I realized today that it has been over a month since I've posted and so much has happened over the last few weeks. My family and I had a successful move back to the great Scioto county where I was born and raised. The minor problems we had with the truck seems so minuscule to me now after all that has happened.

David's job at Bigelow Church was in full swing only a week after our arrival. He is currently in charge of the order of service as well as leading the worship on Sunday mornings. He co-teaches one of the adult Sunday school classes--a review of the Reformation (if you know my husband well, you know that is a complete dream come true). And he is helping to write the curriculum for the next class on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood. He also is scheduled to preach next Sunday morning. He gets along really well with the other pastors and elders and we are constantly amazed at how quickly this church has begun to love and welcome us.

I've already had many opportunities to get involved at the church. My first calling is to help my husband, so I have helped him introduce new songs to the congregation and given him feedback on the service and his Sunday school lessons. I'm getting to know the other pastors' wives pretty well and have already learned so much! I'm excited to glean from their experiences. I've read a lot about being a pastor's wife but nothing compares to observing a wife who has been by her husband's side for over 20 years while he pastored the same church. David and I are meeting new friends at our small group and I've been asked to help plan a women's retreat in the Spring.

As many of you know we had been praying that David would get a job. Our prayers have been answered! David was hired on Tuesday last week as an adjunct professor in English at Shawnee State University. He had wanted to teach there since the first time we thought we were going to move last July but had continuously been discouraged since they weren't hiring and he found out that they required a PhD to teach there. He thought this job was out of the question and had applied at Starbucks, Kroger, and UPS (all places he was just willing to settle for) until our pastor mentioned he knew someone and could get David an interview. The next day he was hired on the spot. God is so good...he orchestrated it so that our faith was strengthened and that David got the job he had truly wanted. Now David is in a position where we are more available to minister to the college students at Shawnee, which is what we had really had a passion for all along.

Please continue to pray for us as our ministry here progresses. We need prayer to help us reach out to the people in our community and to minister to the members of our church. And as well, I still struggle with trusting God with Mia's health and the complications that her condition presents as we try to find insurance. But in all, I am praising the Lord because He has done so much for us and taught us so much...I'm excited to see what He has in store for us.